Choosing Me: Maintaining Friendship on a Busy Schedule

3/14/2013

Maintaining Friendship on a Busy Schedule

Young people often maintain many friendships, some of them close, as they go through school and college. As we get older, however, friendships often become casualties as we battle to find time for increasing family and work responsibilities.

This can be a real loss since strong friendships take time to build and play an important role in our emotional wellbeing. Try to view friendships as one of the priorities in your life and seek opportunities to not only maintain these vital relationships but to nourish them and help them continue to grow.

Tips and Tools You Can Use

Like most close relationships, friendships need a little work and planning to help them continue to thrive. Try to find time to occasionally review your relationships with friends and find ways to keep them strong and healthy. Here are some great tips to help you:

Schedule time for friendships

If you take friendships for granted, they will eventually fade.
Mark friends’ birthdays in your calendar – plan ahead to celebrate together.
Plan time in your schedule each week or month to get together with close friends.
Mark the dates in your calendar and try hard to keep the time open.
If you are forced to cancel, immediately re-schedule for another time.
Be flexible with your friends – if they are forced to cancel, don’t take it personally.

Schedule activities together

If you are always short of time, consider joining up for essential activities.
Do the grocery shopping together or help each other clean house.
Get together at the weekend for a giant cook-up session. Share quantities and split them into freezer portions.
Jog or join the same fitness club.
Schedule haircuts or other appointments for the same time.
Take your children to the park or for swimming lessons together.
If you work close by, commute together or meet for a quick coffee or juice before work.

Stay connected

Send a quick email about a topic you’re both interested in.
Phone when you have 5 minutes to spare.
Leave a cheery message on the answering machine, just to say Hi.
Send birthday cards and vacation postcards.

Plan special breaks

Make it a tradition to go away for a weekend together, once a year.
Plan ahead – half the fun is in the preparation!
Rent video favourites from your teen years and take photo albums and school Year Books.
If a weekend is out of the question, plan an indulgent day at a spa.

Be a friend in need

If a crisis occurs, consider it a priority to be there for your friend.
Avoid being judgmental - listen and make it clear that your support is always there.
Offer practical help with the friend’s children or home.
Let friends in crisis know that they can call on you at any time.
Keep your word – you would expect no less from your friend if you were in crisis.