The Dangeous World... of the Unknown

So what's up with all this "New Age" stuff and why are Christians fearing it so much?

A while back I had a highly-religiously-focused friend send me something along the lines of:

"Subject: The World's "Most Dangerous" Spiritual Guru: Oprah Begins 10-Week Online New Age Class

Article link: http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/archive/ldn/2008/mar/08030701

I sent you this article that describes the dangers of New Age and its teachings and how Oprah Winfrey is promoting it on her show. In particular, read the section where she talks about the movie, "The Secret". I knew you were interested in this movie/book and just wanted to put you on garde as to its dangers for your spirit / soul. Please watch out for these types of influences."

My reply back was along these lines...

I just read the article noted (http://www.lifesitenews.com/ldn/2008/mar/08030701.html) and have the the following to say:

I disagree with your comments and here's why (...remember this is simply my feedback no bad feelings intended):

I've purchased the DVD "The Secret" and enjoyed its concept. Obviously there are a few things that meh? I couldn't be bothered with, but overall the concept is fairly straight forward and accepted (by me). "The Secret" as many other books, movies, religions, whatever all teach us one thing:  

Ask and you Shall receive.  

Whether your link to this 'way-of-being' is adapted from the Bible, from "The Secret", from the "Law of Attraction", from wherever... whatever.. bottom line - we're all talking about the same thing, just in different "languages". 

God, Jesus, Christ, Buddha, Karma - whatever you want to call that "Source" that "Energy" - we all know it's there and it's good.

The struggle (internally) is always about either proving it there or proving it's not there.
Either way - it's being acknowledged somehow: Acceptance or Denial.

I do believe and I do believe that believing is important.

First things first, you need to learn to accept yourself and love yourself - then everything else falls in to play. You are a part of "God". He created you, from himself. If you don't love yourself, then...I guess you don't love him.

"God" (or whatever you call it) always "gives" you want you want, when you love yourself enough to accept it - because you're already a part of him. So the debate is with yourself and from this debate you either ACCEPT or REJECT 'Him'. And with that being said, when things come your way you either ACCEPT or REJECT them consciously or unconsciously.

And then there's the Ego... who sits there patiently EXPECTING.
...so there's a difference between EXPECT and ACCEPT.

Religion is simply a "road", a "path", a "map" to go somewhere - choosing whatever / however you want (as your journey) is a choice and you shouldn't be condemned because of it.
...but somehow isn't this what religion teaches you? ...condemnation and they (Religion Rules) are you're only way to Salvation. Kind-of sounds like the structured dominance rule of "Our (My) Way or the Hwy-Way"...

Ha! So "they" Religion want me to think that if I do anything bad; like: don't go to church to ask for forgiviness, then God will condemn me? He'll throw me to the devil, the evil Gods, and leave me there to burn for eternity? ...And this is the God they expect me to worship?

I think not.

I know that God has shared himself into us (within our minds, within our soul) so that we can experience and learn... and ultimately in the end, choose: love.
That's the whole "Secret" and his whole plan... to eventually learn to "love unconditionally".

Love without discrimination.
Love without guilt.
Love without pressure.
Love without shame.
Love without judgment.
Love without anything else but just love.

There are people out there who are already "conditioned" by Religion, by Media, by the "world" -
they're the ones who's thoughts are "boxed-in" by ways of whatever since they are conditioned to believe that choosing without influence or guidance is wrong.
Geez... I don't know what to do, my husband beats me everyday but the Church tells me to love him and forgive him?
Hum... ok I guess living in Hell right now for my entire life is ok since when I die I'm guaranteed to go to Heaven, right?
...guess what? The Church changes it's rules and guidelines every-so often too...
Hum...? So what does this mean?
It means that the "Church" is ran by humans. Humans making choices for all of their followers.
Sounds like a government to me, or even a mafia! <--- Ha! Ha! Not to be taken too seriously...!!

Governments are bodies of people who make choices for people and these governing bodies tell their people that choices aren't theirs to be made. You can have a say and if I like then fine, otherwise you have to "Do things MY (our) WAY or the Hwy-way!" ...and so if they don't listen they get charged or go to jail...

So maybe I am the one who's converted, maybe I'm the New Age rebellious junky, and maybe I will burn in Hell for eternity. ...and then maybe not... I'm not here to try to convert anyone or change anyone's mind about anything - I'm just here to share my thoughts, my leanings, my beliefs.

If someone wishes to discuss this then BONUS, I would love to discuss -
But what I do believe (for me) is that "God" loves me just as much as he loves a terrorist.
How we choose to accept that love and how we use that love is OUR human choice.

The "Church" doesn't allow me to love thy brother (the terrorist) or the gay man working at the Subway...
...oh sorry - I can love them but I have to pray for them cause they are "wrong"... hum? Sounds discriminating don't you think?
Maybe this "rule" was initially created by some old-school minded Humans?

Nah? I'll take my chances and choose to love and pray my own way - cause I'm sure (since these are my beliefs) my way can't be all that bad.
I do believe in some Religious blessings, in Community Love (Gatherings) and some Celebrations - but Rules are simply a way to "Control" people.
Just like jails are.

Look up the word "control" in the dictionary:
http://www.thefreedictionary.com/control

If you want truth, shut-off the TV, turn-off the Radio, sit by yourself and listen.
...not to the conditioned voices that you first hear inside your head... cause those are all of your pre-existing memories embedded in your head "reminding" you of all the "rules".
...no not those voices... just keep still till those stop and then listen to you.

Cause remember, you are a part of "God", he did create you.
And if Jesus is the son of God and is also a part of him then so are we, and so this is how/why we can live like Jesus. Jesus (or the image of Jesus, or the spiritual representation of Jesus, etc...) is an example of unconditional love. He is our aim, our example on how to love unconditionally.

Stop judging, stop gossiping, stop that negative "thinking".
All these things are simply just "the voices" in your head.
You can ask "God" to help you stop listening to these "conditioned voices" and start creating "new ones". Ones of love and acceptance.

Don't worry about what people say and think -
Obviously I'm not concerned about what you're saying or thinking while your reading this cause it's already said and done. I love myself and that's all that matters - my life is between me and "The Big Guy".

When things come back around - there's a reason for it...it's cause I'm (or someone around me that needs me is) not learning a lesson needing to be learned.
If something keeps coming back, look deep into it and eventually when you are ready  - you'll come to realize that there's actually something there you need to learn.
And when you learn the lesson (needed) then the path continues...and all (the past) is forgotten / forgiven - the lesson is always (in the end) about "love".
..about letting go.
...about loving someone for who they are.
...about finally accepting the people for who they are (not changing people, not controlling them anymore).
...about accepting the situation as it is and not trying to "control" things anymore.
...about loving yourself.

Fear is the opposite of Love.
So if you fear something you will continuously fear it till you let go of that "fear" and just allow yourself to "love" instead.
Believing that "God" will take care of you is "love".
Not believing is living in Fear and so you are not living in "love" and so the circle keeps turning.
You just don't allow "good" to come to you cause you don't believe...
...you don't believe you deserve it; you don't believe in it; you just don't believe...

Whatever you choose is your choice.
Ultimately you may choose to keep-up with your human limitations or not -
but my choice is to keep living in "love".

Heck, it's not easy - but I'm willing to give it a shot!
"God" has taken care of me for this long...

I have 4 wonderful, beautiful children that I've been blessed to parent (the best teaching job ever)!
I have a wonderful understanding fiancé who loves me dearly (a growing experience that allows us both to keep learning together).
I work a tremendously great job helping people help people.
I continuously succeed with learning new things and then graciously get to share these teachings.
...and when things aren't going my way, that's because I'm not going "His" way.

And Yes, "God" gives me money --> if I have good intentions and am not expecting it (because I think I deserve it) and I'm not greedy about it, then yes he does provide for me (and yes in actual monies). If you want proof, ask me and I'll tell you ample stories.

Creating Your Holiday Experience

I enjoy reading Steve Pavlina's blogs and newsletters since he's truthfully honest, no sugar-coating.

Get to the point and tell me what I need to know/hear...
Bitter-sweet; Raw; ...whatever you call it, I like it!!

Thanks Steve for another enjoyable read!

Tammy

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Issue #30 - December 20, 2010 - http://www.stevepavlina.com/

Creating Your Holiday Experience

I've seen a few forum members lamenting that they'll be spending the holidays alone. It appears that this isn't what they want, but they've resigned themselves to it anyway. Their messages broadcast an air of sadness and perhaps a little regret.

It's perfectly fine to spend a holiday alone if that's what you want to experience. There can be many reasons for wanting to do so. Perhaps you value your solitude. Perhaps you don't celebrate certain holidays or find them too commercialized. Or perhaps you just need a break from people. Again, if this is your choice, that's absolutely fine.

But what if your preference is to enjoy a social holiday, and that doesn't seem to be happening? What if you're facing the situation of spending a holiday alone, and you'd rather not have that experience?
The people who find themselves in this situation aren't using their power to proactively create what they desire. They're being too passive to get good results. It's as if they're hoping for some grand invitation to come out of nowhere, when they're scarcely lifting a finger to make their desires a reality. They often invest more energy in complaining than in creating, which is great way to get what they don't want.

Of course if I were to be honest with such people and say to them, "You're using your power stupidly. Stop doing that. It's dumb." they might try to drown me in the punch bowl. So I'll write about it instead, which is much safer. :)

I can empathize with such people and feel compassion for them, but I also know that the "Oh poor baby" approach won't help much. I'd rather offer some realistic advice to get them moving in a positive direction, even if it pisses them off at first. Anger is a higher vibration than sadness, so that's actually a step in the right direction.

This situation is really no different from the person who complains about not being able to find a job while sitting on the couch watching TV or surfing the Internet all day. Does this person expect the phone to start ringing with job offers?

Reaching Out


There's no reason you can't create a wonderful holiday experience for yourself if you're willing to get off your butt and make it happen.

It's silly that so many people spend the holidays in solitude when they could be having a fun, social experience, if only they would take a few simple actions. There are lots of people who'd love to spend the holidays with someone who invited them.

This doesn't mean you have to spend your holidays with people you don't get along with. I'm not suggesting that you tag along for an experience you wouldn't enjoy. But I am suggesting that you have the power to create something fun that works for you.

What kind of people would you like to spend your holidays with? What kinds of activities would you enjoy? Take some time to identify your desires. If you want to spend the holidays alone, that's fine. But if you'd rather have a fun, festive, social experience, what would that look like? Give yourself permission to dream.
Now tell me this. Is it physically impossible to create this holiday you desire? If you really wanted to make it happen, could you do it? Could someone else do it if they were in your shoes?

What's preventing you from making it happen? The problem is seldom "out there." It's usually due to a lack of inner development like low courage or weak social skills. These are fixable problems though. We all start out with certain weaknesses of character, but those weaknesses can be corrected.

Your holiday will ultimately turn out the way you create it to be. You can create a lonely experience, or you can create a festive one. You're always creating something.

The very act of identifying what you desire is a big positive step forward, even if you don't see how to make it happen. Sometimes that's all it takes, and great opportunities will come to you. That won't happen unless you know what you want, however.

What does it take to create a wonderful holiday for yourself? Do you need to bake some cookies? Make some phone calls? Invite people over? Ask others if you can celebrate with them?

Redefining Family Traditions


Some of us grow up with socially conditioned notions of how we should spend the holidays. Since I grew up Catholic, I had pretty rigid notions of how certain holidays are supposed to be celebrated. As I got older, I still liked some of those traditions, but other aspects no longer resonated with me.

I realized that I have the power to create whatever kind of holiday experience I desire. I don't have to settle for a tradition that no longer works for me. I can keep the parts I like and add new ideas as well.

I celebrated the last two Thanksgivings by going to a local raw vegan potluck with 25-30 people, many of whom are friends of mine. I ate an amazing variety of food, had some great conversations, and enjoyed what I perceived to be a more conscious and compassionate way to celebrate this holiday. As I expected, my raw blueberry pie was gobbled up in no time. I loved all the amazing creations people brought -- it was much more colorful than a traditional Thanksgiving dinner. And instead of feeling sleepy afterwards, I felt energized.
On Halloween I was delivering the final day of our last Conscious Growth Workshop. I invited everyone to wear costumes, and about 50 people did so. I delivered the workshop dressed as Obi-Wan Kenobi from Star Wars. I had a blast, and the attendees seemed to enjoy the festive atmosphere as well. It made the learning experience more fun and memorable. I realized that I have the power to create a fun experience whenever I want, even if when I'm speaking on a stage.

Tomorrow I'm catching a flight to Winnipeg, Canada. This will be the coldest place I've ever visited and my first White Christmas ever. It's about 5 degrees F there right now, so I'll probably freeze, but I'm looking forward to the new experience. Rachelle and I plan to do some cross-country skiing, and hopefully we can squeeze in a snowball fight with her friends. We also intend to host a Winnipeg meet-up at The Forks.
These are very different experiences than what I had growing up, but they didn't just happen. I invited them into my life.

Some people also like the experience of doing volunteer work on the holidays. Feed homeless people, pass out gifts to poor kids, or volunteer at a shelter. Does that appeal to you? How hard can it be to find a place to serve?

You have the ability to create whatever holiday experience you desire. It's simply a matter of deciding what you want and exercising your power to make it happen. You're a creative being. Creating a certain holiday experience is within your power.

Building Your Social Skills


Sometimes wonderful invitations will land in your lap. Other times you have to go out and make them happen.

Let me suggest that if no invitations are forthcoming, that's because you're the one who's supposed to do the inviting. Everyone else is waiting on you. Don't let them down.

Creating your own social gathering is a skill. You may not be an expert at it. I'm no Martha Stewart, but with each year I learn a little more about hosting events. I can't say it's a major strength of mine, but I've hosted some potlucks and get-togethers now and then. They've been fun experiences.

Building social skills is like building muscle. The more you train, the stronger you get. When you don't exercise your skills for a while, they atrophy and you grow weaker. That's when you look at something like spending the holidays alone and see it as a daunting problem. In the grand scheme of things, it's a small problem and one that a person with well-developed social skills could solve with a few phone calls. If it seems like a big deal to you, you've allowed your social muscles to atrophy to the point where a 5-pound weight seems too heavy to lift. If that's you, then I'd suggest putting some serious effort into building your social skills during the next year. You can start by joining clubs and going to meet-ups, such as the ones you'll find locally at Meetup.com.

Being socially weak isn't a life sentence. It's your choice if you want to maintain the status quo or become stronger. When you become socially competent, it's fairly easy to design your own holiday experience, invite people you like, and have a fun experience together. It's not like people need a ton of convincing to say yes to a celebration invitation.

If everyone says no because you creep them out or they'd rather do something else, that just means you need to keep working on your social skills -- and probably your self-esteem as well. This is an important path of development for you.

Social Abundance


As you continue to develop your social connections, you may reach the point where you're getting more invitations than you can handle. This is a good problem to have, but don't forget that you're the ultimate creator of your experience.

It can be tempting to always pick from among the options that are offered to you, but realize that you always have the option of creating something new. Even if you get invited to lots of holiday parties, you can still host your own. You have the power to create whatever experience you desire, regardless of other people's expectations. Don't be afraid to say no to the good, so you can say yes to the best.

Creating What You Want


The way to create the holiday experience you desire is to: (1) Let yourself dream about it, to get a sense of what you really want; and (2) Dive into action to move yourself in the direction of that reality. Keep taking action till you figure out how to make it work. Your results won't be perfect, but you'll get a result that's better than nothing, and you'll learn so many lessons that you can apply next time.

The way to create the holiday experience you don't want is to: (1) Think about what you don't want, and (2) Feel bad about it. You can also complain about it to others. Sprinkle some pity on top for good measure, and you'll have a nice little gift to yourself -- the kind of gift you'd rather not receive.

The difference between these two options is choice. Which choice will you make?

I'm choosing the first option. I'm going to enjoy my frozen holiday in Winnipeg. :)

Happy Holidays!

Until next time, live consciously!

Steve Pavlina

This newsletter is uncopyrighted. Feel free to share it.

Knowledge, Power and Energy - What the heck are you talking about?

Watch live streaming video from peakpotentials at livestream.com

In this interview with T. Harv Eker, Harv answers some questions relating to money and success from general people. Harv's main message is to have people understand that they need to "own your power and live by example" (mentorship). He also goes on to explain that people need to "come from who you are" - you can't change or pretend to be something you're not. This is what causes "Opportunites (to become) can be obstacles" - because not being yourself you loose lack of your focus. Your focus being you.

If you start wanting too much, wanting a go on a trip, wanting to buy a new car, wanting to get a new job, wanting to change your relationship, wanting ... wanting... wanting - you have too many focuses. How can the universe give you anything, how can it provide a focus - when you yourself aren't focused on what you want? Focusing on too many little (or big) things gets you no where - you need to give (1) focus your full attention so that you can commit to it and it then becomes your path - your soul focus.

Focus on this path. Commit to that hard work and learn about it, learn all you need to know about it - be it. Learn about you within this path. How can you make this focus a reality? What do you need to do?

This is where Action = Fear. Are you willing to take the necessary action(s) inspite of the fear you are feeling? How do you push through this fear? How do you move forward? The answer is simple - just like you would do for anything else: Train. You need to train yourself, your brain, your mental state, your physical state, your heart, your soul - whatever - you need to train you.

"Fear is the yellow light that turns green." T. Harv Eker

You need to acknowledge that fear because it's real - it's there. But beyond that, you still need to go for it... one step at a time of course! And how to best arm yourself from this fear --> knowledge. The more you know, the more power you give yourself to take action. "Once you're in ACTION fear goes away" T. Harv Eker.

What is power? Power is simple - Power is knowing that your mental; physical; and spiritual states are all interconnected. You can't drive a car without gas; wheels; or a motor can you? You need all of these piece in place to make it work. Also, can you drive if you have a motor; wheels but no gas? NO! You need all 3 - You need to connect to your Mental; Physical and Spiritual YOU. You can't successfully succeed at anything till you do that. The 'outter' world is always temporary. Things around you will always change. Therefore you need to take care of what you can control and that's your 'inner' world - your roots. Once you've got the root (you) worked out then everything else will take care of itself. How? How can you say that? ...you ask. Because you believe it - because you believe in you. Are you really going to let yourself down? Yes you might trip and fall - you might even brake a leg in the process... but REALLY - the REALITY of it all is that you consiously know that you want what's best for you. So if you truly believe that you've reached your limit and this is as good as it gets for you... then guess what? The universe's answer to you is: Your wish is my command. Why...

Karma: What you give is what you get. <-- Universal Law

If you're not giving yourself the permission to move beyond where you are. If you're not giving yourself the permission to grow; to change; to whatever... then "You're wish is my command" is what you get. And guess who picked that for you... You did. Isn't that pretty crappy? You can't make things better if you don't believe you can - You'll never be able to afford it if you never believe you can. You'll never go anywhere if you don't believe you can. You'll never ... because you don't believe - and because you don't believe, you don't even try.

T. Harv Eker also explains: "Everything is Energy. Money is Energy. ...and Your Energy projection is your results..". So what does this mean? Well again - if you don't use your energy, it's being wasted isn't it? You create it on-goingly but choose to simply just not use it... why? Cause basically you don't really believe in it so what does it matter? Use it - It's there...! Plus you're the one who created, who creates it on-goingly!

So now how can you use this "Energy" to create something? Well think beyond your value. If you have a talent and are providing a service or solving a problem - why can't you double this?
I don't have time...
I don't have enough money...
I just have too much too do...
There's just one of me and I can't do it alone...
Blah blah blah... sob sob sob... me, me, me...
Look at me I'm a poor victim <-- Your wish is my command.

"Think beyond your value" T. Harv Eker
Harv continues with "...have a passion for your ability to solve... passion for what you do... LOVE what you do! ... Be confident that you can do well in any arena as long as you have a passion for it...".
Build your knowledge.
Believe in yourself - believe you are an expert... You're an expect at that moment, with that client... this moment in time is all that matters right now and give that person everything you've got - with Passion!!

Main principle message:

If you want apples then you need to plant the tree. <-- Start at the root. What are your beliefs, your blockages? Do you have the right soil? Do you have the right seeds? Are your roots ready...

You can't expect apples to grow from a lemon tree. <-- Knowledge: Build your knowledge so that you understand what you need to know...

Get down and dirty and plant your seeds. <-- Put focus where focus is due. You can't just expect to walk outside and expect an apple tree to just pop-up in your yard, fully grown and be ready to be harvested... REALITY CHECK! You need to get down on your knees and plant those seeds and wait... Your work will give you results, if you've invested in the right "focus".

T. Harv Eker provides an analogy as follows:

If I asked you if you could walk a mile - you'd probably say "ya sure I could do that".
If I asked you if you could run a mile - you'd probably say "what? no - couldn't... well maybe... but it would be hard".
If I asked you if you could walk 25 miles - you'd probably say "ya but again it would be hard and long..."
If I asked you if you could run 25 miles - you'd probably say "what are you crazy, I couldn't run 25 miles straight through without stopping!"
If I asked you then if you could run 25 miles in a year - you'd probably say "well maybe I could do that"
I would then ask: "how and why would in a year from now be so different?"
You'd say: "Because I could take the time to train. I could pace myself and by next year I could be ready."

Key here - is training; knowledge and belief.
If you train YOU (Physically) by knowing what to do (Knowledge - Mental) then you believe (Spirit) that you CAN do it - and then before you know it you're running 25 miles!

The mind is a powerful tool. It holds millions and millions of files filled with information we gather from every day, every moment of our lives. Those files are what creates our belief system. If even one of those files is filled with false information, this can cause us a blockage. Now if multiple of these files are filled with false hope; false values; empty promises; restrictive beliefs... all of this is limiting ourself from our own success.
We are stopping ourselves because of what we think we know, of what we think is right... You need to look deep and find those files, identify them, and change them. Allow yourself to replace those files, or at least some of them, with new - up-to-date - real information.

If as a child you were always told that you need to work to get what you want and that nothing in life is free... then what are your files telling you?
"Don't accept anything from anyone cause it's not really Free..."
"Don't offer anything to anyone cause you'll end up paying for it..."
"If it's easy, it's no good - you need to work hard for things to have value..."
Wow... those are some messed-up files!
You need to find those and change them fast!
...cause this blog you are reading... it's easy to read and it's free!

Humm... got you thinking, right?

Using Soft Skills to Create a Substainable Career Strategy

Thought of the day: "I thought I already knew what I needed to do - however after talking to the fishing guide - I realized that I needed to make minor changes. And after making them, I started catching more fish with less effort."

More fish, less stress.

What is this - it's Change Management.

Career Strategy: What's your plan?
Function Plan: Layout of outcome.

Skills: Skill set transfer
How am I going to get there?

Financial Plan: Achieve goals
Financial Planner: Success principal

A Plan: A plan is your career investment.

Compound interest effect:
- Education
- Training
- Networking
- Courses
- Appropriate amount of investment

Managing by Momentum
Ex. GM vs. HONDA

GM: listen to momentum; go with wants and expectations
HONDA: one direction and stayed focus

* Momentum: in the flow without stopping to really pay attention. *

"Better Career is a Better Life"
Managing your choices.

Strategies vs. Plan

Strategies: goes with changes; formulate a plan but accept changes; people-skills / pay attention
Plan: static; timelines

Vision

Where do you want to be?
What do they look like?
Where are they?
Who are they?
** Ask these questions with a view on people who are already "there" (vision). **

Benchmarking

What will I do / What did they do?
What are the steps to take / What steps did they take?
Elements that lead to their outcomes...

Secret Lure: Is it "the" thing needed?

"Be who you are, not what somebody else is."
This means: know who you are; know what you represent; play your strengths.

FORMULA vs. FRAMEWORK

FORMULA: recreate the same thing (me too types); what is changed? (nothing...); I have to be ____________; I have to leave __________; etc.

FRAMEWORK: what is it they've "got" that we don't?; flexibility to change; seeing the "Big Picture"; strengths; sense of "Plan"; where have I been successful?; is there a pattern?; etc.

Ask yourself:
"Is that what you should do? OR Is that a "me too" response?"
** Review your Benchmarks **

Know Thyself: only 20% know their strengths.
Learn about you.
Learn about your strengths.
Learn about your patterns / as it relates to who I am.
** These are your personal offerings. **

Branding / Marketing [of yourself]

- Capacity
- Strengths
- Manage your visibility
- Know your values
** These are your internal and external brandings. **

VALUE: I have "it" so I should get it, right?
Not anymore. This view point is "old school".

"Most wealthy people have a financial plan."

See your career strategy / plan the same way.
Best Practices.

Training: Gives you time to think; develops your value(s); get visibility.

Remember: "Your Network is your Net-worth."

"It's not about who you know... but more about, who knows you."

Hard Skills: MBA; PHD; Technical Elements of a profession; sector specific

Ex. MD = gets you to be a doctor.
PROMOTION ASSUMPTIONS

Soft Skills: Gets you to become the CEO of the Hospital

- What extent are they a team-player?
- Behaviour
- Relationship-centric
- Task-centric
- How do you manage your time?
- How do you manage your tasks?
- How do you manage your relationships?

Communication Skills: How do you communicate with people?

Implementing: Do you carry things through?

Project Management is difficult; it requires a lot of SOFT SKILLS; and conflict resolution.

STUDY: Project Management effectiveness (14% Hard Skills) / (86% Soft Skills)

Challenge: Do "we" buy-in to that? (the Soft Skills)

"Less work just more knowledge and applying it properly."

What can I learn from it / from others?

Mental Health = Mental Toughness

"The new norm is crisis."

What is your ability to manage change?
What is your ability to manage change within yourself?

Response Results = Performance

"Got to think outside the Box but somewhat is the Box too."

I'm not just a Project Manager...
I'm not just a ....

What has been working for you?
What are you?
Re-imaging yourself...

Example: Apple (MacIntosh)
They re-imaged themselves; The re-invented themselves; marketed that they are now different; and engaged a new audience.

Example: RIM & Apple
They don't sell, they help people buy.

The companies used a pitch with the end-result in mind.
They're getting the customer to buy the outcome.
They're not in it to sell the product but believe that the product is there to solve a problem so they're there to help the customer find it and buy it.

Training & Coaching: "Be the Guide"
Take the knowledge and turn it into wisdom.

Training & Coaching is a conversation.

"People need to gain the motivation to ask - the generation of need."

Bottom Line:

"Know what you know & Know what you don't know."

www.careerjoy.com

Repairing a Strained Customer Relationship

Where did we go wrong?

Get the Facts.

Acknowledge the complaint.

Listen and repeat back.

Acknowledge the error and regret.

Rectify the problem.

Ask the customer.

Go one better.

Defusing a hostile customer.

Be prepared.

Take this at the right time.

Maintain self-control.

Depersonalize the issue.

Emphasize that you share a problem and encourage the client to work with you towards a resolution.

Team / People Building

5 Dysfunctions of a Team

1. Absence of Trust.

2. Fear of Conflict.

3. Lack of Commitment.

4. Avoidance of Accountability.

5. Inattention to Results (Goals).

Team Building needs communication; consistency in the messaging and understanding of the message. It also requires chemistry - Right people and trust so that people know and trust.
e.g. "Got your back"; and also sharing even of "Behind closed doors" input.

Negative People

First question: Do they still care?
If no, then it's time for them to move on.
If yes, then find out what motivates them?

What are their strengths?
What do they Love / Hate?
What are they passionate about / good at?
Help put them into a position that best suits them.

* One presenter said: "Sometimes you have those negative people who are just negative about everything. Sometimes you just got to throw them in the fire so that they can see the flames." *

Staffing Recommendations

Put skills where they are needed.

"Fill-in" staff weaknesses.

Build a good company "culture".

Staff need to "Buy-in" to goals of the organization otherwise they're just "working" and aren't looking longer-term.

Find the "Right" people.

What do you want to do at this company?

Know who (types) you are looking for.

Ask the right questions...

Support your staff.

Match weakness and strengths.
Ex. Opposites (sometimes)
(a) Coder & Sales
(b) Coder & Debbuger

(b) always corrects (a)'s code and gaps. However annoying this is it is required to succeed.

Balance is needed to evole.

Know when to give-up some stuff and trust others that can do it well.

Good Manager to Great Leader

Leaders need to know the full battle plan for the whole strategic campaign. Managers are the facticians - they're the platoon leaders and section leaders and section leaders that carryout the orders.

Leaders need to be visionaries and do a good job at selling that vision to others. Managers need to figure out the ways to get that vision.

Know your Team

Be aware of your army's strengths and weaknesses.
Example: Regular testing of skills and inclinations.

* Know which team member would benefit from additional training, coaching or encouragement...

Leader knows which peg to put in the right hole and how much that peg needs to be push down the hole

* This doesn't mean that only people who posses skills for a certain task are given that task though. It's important that you don't pigeon-hole people for their skills.

Build Trust

Employees need the assurance that their leader knows what he is doing and that his decisions take into account their well being. This degree of trust will help ensure that "things get done and the same preferred results are achieved whether or not the leader is present."

People need to be assured that you are who you say you are.

It's also about building a good relationship with your people and obtaining their respect.

Instill Openness

Employees need to know they can always approach you and talk to you even if their views differ from your.

* An important part of this quality is the ability to admit one's own mistakes, accept challenges and new ideas.

Embrace diversity

Leaders need to be mindful and respectful of differences in culture and work practices of employees and learn to use these to the organization's advantage.

Invest in your growth

Don't take on the whole world. To motivate your need to learn to delegate.

A good leader takes time to acquire new skills, keep up to date with industry developments as well as the world in general, to continue being a well-rounded person.

Good is the opposite of great. One of the most enduring qualities of a great leader is their ability to rally people around a cause.

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Proverb: No man on his deathbed says he wishes he spent more time at the office.
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Understand the Business

Start by thinking how can you enable this business user to serve their customers better.

Step back and examine what is the value of what you are doing to the company's customer.

Junk the tech lingo and adopt the biz jargon.

Find a Sponsor

Find a mentor or sponsor who will champion your cause.

Go for Frequent Small Victories

Boost employee morale and gain more recognition by initiating projects that result in a series of small success rather than concentration on a large project.

Zoom in on quick turn around

When the emphasis is on budget slashing, companies are on the look out for low-cost projects with shorter turn around times.

Use tech trends to improve productivity

Business are not focused on looking for people who can invent the technology as they are on people who know how to use the technology to improve productivity or boost profits.

SMART - what does this mean?

S = Streamline

M = Manage

A = Access

R = Retain

T = Toss

10 Stress Management Tips

1. Time in yourself should be viewed as time invested.
Example: maintaining your car --> you should invest in yourself in the same way.

2. Stop Procrastinating.

3. Identify Stress Factors.

4. Choose your attitude .

5. Humour / Laugh.

6. Prioritizing.

7. Learn to say "No".

8. Exercise.

9. Delegate.

10. Be "In Your Control".

Creating Abundance - Are you controlling your life or are you submitting to it?

I just finished viewing Steve Pavlina's Creating Abundance video blog (4 part series). What are my reactions? Well first off I think that in general if you project confidence in anything then the world is at your feet.

I know that for some it's easier said then done however is it really? Or are they just choosing the easy road and choosing not to make the necessary efforts? Heck who am I anyways...

I'm a middle-class worker who is choosing to change my life and my lifestyle for the best. I choose to live consciously. I understand that the mind is a powerful tool and that we are programmed and conditioned to think and live certain ways since that's just the way things are.

I don't have a teacher's degree however I teach in a Community College. Whenever people find this out they immediately say to me (or at least their eyes speak it to me very clearly): "What gives you the right to teach in a College, you're not qualified? It's probably not an accredited course, right?"

Well indeed it is - and who would you better learn from, someone who's read about something or from someone who's lived it? And if I wasn't good enough then why would the College coordinators allow me to teach?

I had to step outside the norm and out of my comfort zone to get to this point. I still work full-time and now teach every Fall semester too. Does it scare me? Of course it does, but that's why I do it. Stepping out of that comfort zone is what breaks the mold. Otherwise you are conditioned to what's around you.

What you know now is what got you where you are, now what? What's your next steps? Are you ready to live outside your norm, to leave that security nest and to shake things up? Submitting yourself to your fears, to your guilt, to your thoughts aren't going to get you anywhere else then where you are already.

Be the change -

Here is Steve Pavlina' Part I video, you can access the other 3 parts via the side menu and simply choose to view the next videos:

Are you destined to be a Millionaire?

Just finished reading T. Harv Eker's book Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth and I have to say Harv's viewpoints are pretty basic however mind altering.

Here's a quick summary of Harv's theory via a Fox Interview:



Harv's most famous quote is: "Give me five minutes, and I can predict your financial future for the rest of your life! How? By identifying your personal 'money and success blueprint.'"

Now myself, upon reading Secrets of the Millionaire Mind caught myself realizing that I indeed do have money files / money blueprints embedded in me that are blocking my road to becoming a millionaire. Some of the blockages or primary sources of this programming or conditioning, as described in the book, are created from your past, especially from your childhood.

What you saw, heard, felt, thought from all those who surround you as a child got engraved in your mind. How your parents, siblings. friends, authority figures, teachers, religious leaders, media, and your culture to name a few - how these people acted towards money, towards life is what gets recorded in your money files.

Harv explains: "Your programming leads to your thoughts; your thoughts lead to your feelings; your feelings lead to your actions; your actions lead to your results.
Therefore, just as is done with a personal computer, by changing your programming, you take the first essential step to changing your results."

The book asks you to ask yourself some questions: "Who are you? How do you think? What are your beliefs? What are your habits and traits? How do you really feel about yourself? How confident are you in yourself? How well do you relate to others? How much do you trust others? Do you truly feel that you deserve wealth? What is your ability to act in spite of fear, in spite of worry, in spite of inconvenience, in spite of discomfort? Can you act when you're not in the mood?
The fact is that your character, your thinking, and your beliefs are a critical part of what determines the level of your success."

The book is split into two parts - Part I Provides you with an understanding of what "Your Money Blueprint" is and then Part II Describes "The Wealth Files: Seventeen Ways Rick People Think and Act Differently from Poor and Middle-Class People", then to end the book Harv gives a short "So What the Heck Do I Do Now?" conclusion.

This book demonstrated to me that my perception of rich people is indeed a blockage and that I need to stop denying or trying to convince myself that money isn't important. I can't help others if I can't take care of myself - and all that "crap" being drilled into my head when I was younger about money changes you; rich people don't care; you don't need money to be happy; money makes people evil; blah blah blah ... all those things are said to you by who? By people who don't have money.

If you wanted to buy a house would you talk to someone who's never own one? Or to someone who owned one but lost it? Or would you have to someone who has a house or even multiple houses?

If you are a complaining type that believes that life is terrible and that everyone is spoiled and why me, why me, why me (victim mode)... then the universe has no other choice but to keep feeding you the bullcrap you keep calling out for. You can't complain about nothing can you - so the universe has to keep giving you things to complain about because that's who you are. Remember, you choose this yourself.

Life is what you make of it - it doesn't just come to you. If you vibrate power, if you resonate confidence then I truly believe that the universe will cooperate with you and provide for you. Why do you think good things keep happening to good people? Because they are steal, cheat and lie? No because they're good people and they reflect that goodness and so the universe keeps providing what they / who they are.

So now - what / who are you? And if this isn't who / what you want to be... what are you going to do about it?

Where do you fit in what you do?

Sometimes I don't know how to share ideas cause I sometimes don't think people completely understand what I'm trying to explain. Explaining things out-loud at times doesn't serve the idea or concept being shared, true meaning. And because not everyone thinks the same way it's hard to conceptualize an idea so generically for all to understand.

I worry that people will interpret what I'm saying in the wrong way.
I worry that people might spread my idea inappropriately or destroy its value by broadcasting it too openly.
I worry that people think they understand when in reality they really don't.
I worry that people... are people, unlike me.

So how is it that some people are able to share everything they know and not have these worries?
How can some people simply let-go of the ownership of their thoughts?
Is it because they believe that sharing is growth?
The more your give the more you'll receive, thus the more you share, the more you'll learn.

The more you know, the more you want to  know, the better it is to know, the better you become.
Life is about learning: Information is knowledge.

"Remember, life is not a destination, it is a journey. Enjoy the ride." Karen Hourtovendo

I guess if everyone did think the same way the world would probably be very automated and boring. I don't think it would work since who'd want to do the jobs that none of us want to do? Who'd learn all the stuff that we'd all not want to learn? Who would pick up my garbage every week? Who would clean the city streets?

In every work environment there are a wide range of people - different people types. They do what they do and I do what I do. We're all different. Some more then others, but thank goodness we're all different.


Now looking at what you do:

• what brings you to what you do? 
• did you end-up choosing your career / lifestyle or did it just gradually happen? 
• how do your skills fit in?
• what interests do you have?
• what are some of the things you like (i.e. hobbies)?
• what types of places do you like?
• what makes you happy?
• what would you want to do?
• where would you like to go?
• what is the core of your career?
• what do you contribute?
• what is the Big Picture of what you do?
• how does what you do make a difference in other people's lives?
• what is the essence of what you do right now?
• what represents [love, happiness, fun, peacefulness, family, success, etc.] to you?

In reading Stephen Covey's book: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People , Stephen discusses goals, dreams, purpose, mission. He provides an excellent breakdown of some of the questions we ask ourselves:

• What do you want to do? [Desire] = Passion
• What can you do? [Ability] = Talent
• What should you do? [Purpose] = Mission
• What must you do? [Need] = Abundance

Once you review your 'likes' and 'dislikes', decide exactly what it is you want to accomplish, then put it down in writing, and review it on a daily basis. Bring your goals into reality.


When I mention career in this article I am generalizing it to anything you are doing as a lifestyle. If you are committed to repeating a task day after day after day - I would say that, for now, it's your career, that is what you do.

i.e. If you are a stay-at-home mother - you are a teacher; coach; chef; housekeeper; book keeper; etc...
This is your career, your lifestyle - for the time being (because at some point, these children are going to leave - then what?).

In reviewing these questions, look deep within yourself and try to see where you fit, what is your purpose...
In mentioning purpose, I leave you with this video:

Pursue Your Passion by Kirk Nugent

Leaders and Followers: How to Start a Movement

Derek Sivers: How to start a movement | Video on TED.com



As Derik Sivers describes a movement, he states: "Leadership is over glorified. ...it was really the first follower that transformed the lone nut into a leader.... If you really care about starting a movement, have the courage to follow and show others how to follow."

So what does this mean to you? How does this apply to your life?

Life is full of "movements". I know I can't be a leader for everything / everyone but I sure can pick and choose who I'm following or what I choose to lead.

I follow leaders who represent truth - what I believe is 'my' truth. If I were to tell you that I'm a follower of Personal Development and Positive Alignments, this would be my truth, my paths. You, as an entirely separate person, might not have the same 'truths' or 'paths' thus wouldn't necessarily choose to follow the same leaders I do. And that's perfectly fine. Just know who you choose to follow.


Also to take into consideration is the number. If you start to follow a movement and then another, and then another... just remember that too much of a good thing can be bad. You can't be a good follower if you're following too many leaders.

On the flip-side, if you decide you want to be the 'lone nut' or aka 'leader' then you also have responsibilities. If you have followers, they are there because they believe in you, they believe in what you are representing, they believe in your leadership. Wow that's a huge responsibility! What can you do about this? Nurture your followers and allow them to self-develop and teach them what you know. Doing so spreads that responsibility and accountability to the entire "crowd". It now becomes not just what you are saying / doing but what everyone in this movement are saying / doing. Create the momentum, share the acknowledgements, and thrive on the growth!